INSIDE OF
Sensually Embodied Living
A grounded return to your body, your truth, and the you beneath the PERFORMANCE.
You don’t need more information.
You don’t need another strategy for “becoming better.”
You’re here because something deeper has been stirring.
A knowing that life isn’t meant to be managed, performed, or held together by force.
This work is a descent.
Not into chaos, but into your body’s truth.
Into the part of you that never needed to earn softness, connection, joy or rest.
This is a facilitated journey out of your protective mind & coping strategies…
And into your deeply feeling, sensual self.
SELM guides you to unwind survival patterns like perfectionism, over-functioning, emotional bracing,
And build the capacity to meet life from steadiness instead of self-protection.
You learn to trust yourself at a nervous-system level, not through effort or mindset,
But through presence, sensation, sovereignty, and lived practice.
Here, the feminine isn’t an aesthetic.
It’s a way of resourcing your entire system through slowing, feeling, softening, and learning the art of choosing a different pattern in real time.
You will learn to hold discomfort without collapsing.
To allow joy without guilt.
To meet yourself without running.
This is where the performance ends and wholeness begins.
Where life becomes less about keeping it together and more about finally being here. Right here.
Not fixed;
Equipped.
Rooted in your body.
Able to hold more of life, love, and leadership without losing yourself.
This is how we live from truth instead of tension
how softness becomes strength through presence,
and how the nervous system remembers how to open again
Welcome to the work that brings you home.
the sensually embodied living method
A ceremonial, sensual, somatic return to the woman in you beneath the performance and the pushing through.
Understand your inner world at a nervous-system level:
You’ll learn how your conscious mind, subconscious patterns, and nervous system work together, not just as theory, but as lived experience in your body.
You’ll identify and unwind the habits of self-protection that once helped you survive; perfectionism, over-functioning, withdrawal, emotional bracing, and develop the capacity to meet life with steadiness, presence, and choice instead of defaulting to old patterns.
You’ll stop managing yourself and start relating to yourself in a way that creates true safety, connection, and internal trust.
Embodiment as a lived practice, not a concept:
You’ll learn to release tension and holding patterns that represent self-protection and self-doubt, and rebuild a relationship to your body that feels like home, strength, softness, and truth at the same time.
You’ll practice becoming the woman you already are now, instead of waiting for a future version to arrive or until everything feels “healed.”
You’ll learn to move emotion through your body instead of looping in anxiety.
You’ll learn to hold more without the overwhelm, and stay present to yourself in moments that once made you disconnect or shrink.
This is where “embodiment” stops being an idea and becomes the way you live.
Reclaim your body, sensuality, and sexual energy:
You will rebuild your relationship with your body as a place of truth, power, and aliveness, not something to manage, judge, or ignore.
You’ll learn to process emotion sustainably,
To transmute intensity without bypassing or collapsing,
And to let desire and pleasure become a source of nourishment and guidance, not a reward or something to be ashamed of.
You’ll restore a sense of sensuality and pleasure back into your life so you can continue to open deeper, rather than contract and perform.
I’ll teach you my grounded approach to working with sexual energy as medicine to heal emotional pain, deepen presence, and sustain pleasure in a way that feels safe, sacred, and real.
No fluff. No performance.
Just a slow, invitational return to your own body as a temple.
A place where you meet yourself and something higher, within you.
Your sensuality & felt sense of beauty becomes your medicine. An opening and a doorway into your deeper truth as woman on earth.
This is where self-trust roots down in your bones,
Where confidence grows naturally & sustainably,
And where connection to spirit becomes a felt reality, not a concept.
The Intimacy Codes™
You will learn a body-led way of relating, leading, and loving that I developed through years of somatic, polyvagal, energy, and ceremonial work.
This is how you become the most grounded, attuned, and trustworthy woman in the room;
not because you perform confidence, not because you’re always perfect, but because you know how to hold yourself in truth & attune to the mometn with deep presence & energetic awareness.
The Intimacy Codes™ teach you to:
be in relationship without losing yourself
set boundaries without hardness
create safety & openness for all involved
read others body language proficiently
hold your power without overpowering
stay open and sensitive without hyper-vigilance
cultivate safety and intimacy wherever you go, without over-giving or shrinking
This is nervous-system work, emotional maturity, feminine leadership, and subtle energy work woven into a way of being that you live, not perform.
It is how you become a woman who can hold more life, more love, more leadership without tightening, managing, or bracing.
This is where your body stops being a stranger or something you have to control, and becomes your greatest source of safety, power, intuition, and pleasure.
Where self-trust is embodied, not talked about.
Where pleasure becomes natural, not earned or performative.
Where sensitivity becomes strength, not fragility.
This is where you become a woman rooted, resourced, and real; who can meet life fully.
A woman remembers herself in SELM.
Not by adding more to her life,
but by finally letting herself Arrive in it. Unravel in it. Feel it.
This is where you exhale the performance.
Where your shoulders drop.
Where your body says, finally… she’s listening.
Where softness stops feeling dangerous
And presence becomes your greatest power.
Here, you learn the quiet art of being met
by your own breath, your own knowing,
your own steady, pulsing aliveness.
Nothing to force.
Nothing to prove.
No holding what is not yours to hold.
Just you, returning to the woman you’ve always been
beneath the armor, the old stories, the expectations.
A Sacred Ceremony to Meet Yourself More Fully
***Ceremony is optional and invitational, offered with deep integrity for those who feel truly called and prepared, and entered only when there is clear readiness and alignment.
As part of your SELM journey, you may have the opportunity to sit in an intimate, overnight plant-medicine ceremony held with your cohort sisters.
This experience is not automatically included in tuition and is never assumed, because true ceremonial work is a choice, a calling, and a sacred responsibility.
Throughout SELM, your nervous system is gently prepared,
not to chase a breakthrough,
but to cultivate the capacity to meet yourself in a whole new way.
So if ceremony becomes aligned for you,
you enter not from urgency or seeking intensity,
but from grounded readiness, calling, and a clear inner yes.
This is not escapism.
Not a peak-high moment.
Not a shortcut.
It is a devotional doorway,
entered slowly, with reverence, safety, and support.
Held by Ray & other experienced facilitators in intimate circle of women,
you practice surrender with dignity,
trust without abandoning yourself,
and presence in moments where the mind cannot lead,
only your body and truth can.
Ceremony becomes an anchor point,
not an escape from life, but a deeper arrival into it.
A place where integration meets initiation.
Where softness meets strength.
Where your own wisdom rises to meet you in real time.
And when you return, you come back more resourced,
more open, more rooted in your truth,
and more able to hold life as it comes
with presence, capacity, and quiet power.
Ceremony Invitation Policy
Ceremony is an optional offering for those who feel called and prepared,
and is facilitated only when there is clear readiness and alignment. Because of the nature of medicine work, you must be in a space where you are physically, mentally and spiritually ready for the jounrey. You and Ray will work together to discuss alignment. And if it is not the time for you, the door will remain open for you in the future.
“Every sunrise lands differently on your skin.
Music doesn’t just play, it moves through you.
A smile reaches the parts of you that used to stay guarded.
Tears become a soft release,
not evidence that you’re breaking,
but proof that you’re alive.
Grief isn’t a setback anymore.
It’s a way back into your humanity.
Imagine emerging from numbness into a life that feels textured, vivid, awake.
Imagine trusting yourself, even with a history that once made that feel impossible.
Imagine having an embodied way of meeting life;
a nervous-system anchored rhythm that holds you through the waves,
so you don’t have to hold everything alone.
Imagine pleasure and joy no longer being brief visitors,
but your body’s natural language.
Confidence becoming a quiet, effortless hum beneath your skin.
You look around and realize:
You built a life you don’t need to escape from, but one you are deeply proud to live inside.”
i’m RAY
For most of my life, I lived in my mind.
Over-efforting. Over-giving. Over-proving.
Holding it all together because I didn’t know another way.
The world taught me to stay strong by tightening, bracing, pushing through.
But my body was asking for something else; softness, safety, breath, and a way of living that didn’t cost my aliveness.
What I teach now is not a concept.
It’s a lived path back to the body;
To truth, tenderness, capacity, and real connection.
I don’t offer performance.
I offer practice.
I offer presence.
I offer women a way to come home to themselves in a world that taught us to leave.
We’ve been conditioned to overwork, overperform, overprotect, and overprove.
And now, we’re waking up to the cost:
Anxiety.
Self-doubt.
Numbness.
Hyper-independence.
Perfectionism and shutdown.
Partnerships built on survival instead of intimacy.
Lives that look full but feel quietly hollow.
Women tell me every day:
“I’ve done the work, but I still don’t feel like I’m fully living my life.”
My work is not about giving you more information. Although you will receive potent teachings & frameworks.
It’s about teaching you how to come back to your nature;
To relearn how to feel, soften, trust, express, and receive.
You learn to meet your emotions without collapsing or overriding.
To move energy through the body instead of storing it as tension or illness.
To hold your pain with presence and let it transform you, instead of harden you.
We work with the nervous system in its most primal language; sensation, breath, safety, rhythm, presence;
so trauma, fear, and old identities can finally loosen their grip,
and you can live from your body, not your survival patterns.
This is where sensuality returns as a resource,
where rest becomes strength,
where boundaries become loving instead of defensive,
and where self-trust roots itself deeper than logic ever could.
Through this work, women become relaxed and powerful at the same time.
Soft and steady.
Capable of holding life, and letting life hold them too.
The Sensually Embodied Living Method is a profound training in being a woman who is resourced, connected, embodied, and free
Not only in how you live…
But also in how you show up for others.
A way of moving through the world that is ancient and yet deeply needed now:
A woman anchored in her body.
A woman who trusts herself.
A woman who is alive in her life, not performing it.
A woman deeply in her joy, not her trauma.
When we are embodied, we are deeply aware. When we are aware, we have accurate information. When we have information, we have choice. And ultimately, when we have choice… we have the truest form of freedom.
a little bit about
ray
I’ve spent more than 15 years inside this work, not just studying it, but living it.
At seventeen, I was handed pills instead of answers.
When the only advice was “up the dose,” I chose another path.
I spent years healing my body and nervous system naturally, learning how to unwind the patterns that fed anxiety, disconnection, and self-protection.
My path has been part science, part study, part prayer, and a lot of lived experience.
From trauma-informed somatics and breathwork, to lineage-honoring ceremony and feminine initiation, to integrative therapies…
I don’t just teach theories.
I teach what’s real, embodied, and sustainable,
What I’ve lived through my own body, and witnessed in the women that I serve.
I have been on this path for over 15 years.
Not just in theory, in lived devotion.
At seventeen, I found myself on more anti-anxiety medication than most adults.
When the only options offered were stronger doses and new prescriptions, I chose a different direction.
I didn’t know then that it would lead me into a lifelong journey of nervous-system healing, emotional safety, ancestral and attachment repair, and true embodied spirituality.
I just knew my body was asking for a way home.
Over time, I healed naturally.
I learned to understand the roots of my anxiety rather than numb them.
I repaired the physical toll medication had taken.
And I began to study the language of the body; the way trauma, grief, desire, and intuition live in our tissues, breath, and depth.
My education has been both formal and initiatory:
Integrative Somatic Trauma Therapy
Psychedelic-Assisted Support Training
Breathwork & Meditation Certifications
NLP foundations
Years of mentorship with healers, facilitators, medicine women, and nervous-system practitioners
Countless hours inside ceremony, circle, and real-life thresholds
But what shapes my work the most is lived experience.
The years of sitting with women. Of sitting with myself.
The thousands of moments I've held breath, emotion, shaking, breakthrough, grief, and remembering.
I believe in work that is tangible, applicable, and rooted in the body.
No fluff.
No spiritual performance.
No concepts that float above real life.
I created this work because women deserve a path that is both deeply ceremonial and profoundly practical.
Something more intimate than therapy,
And more grounded than many spiritual spaces.
This is my life’s devotion.
To serve women.
To walk beside them as they remember their own wisdom,
Their capacity,
Their tenderness,
Their power,
And the quiet, steady safety of their own bodies.
I’m honored to walk with you.
And I cannot wait to share this work with you;
Every tool, every truth, every ounce of lived knowing that you will be able to take, and make your own.
Sensual & Somatic Pathways to Healing
This path doesn’t turn you into someone else, it returns you to who you’ve always been.
A woman whose pleasure is her first language,
and whose body becomes a place she can trust and rest in,
even through life’s biggest waves.
words from
selm students
maddy m.
“SELM is the most important and beautiful self improvement work. Life-changing and grounding. Before SELM I was in a place of confusion, numbness, and not knowing my worth. Now, half way through, I’m in a place of finding clarity, regaining strong and deep feelings, and knowing my worth more than ever.”
vandita a.
“Before SELM I was so lost but had convinced myself I was doing the “work” while actually just numbing constantly and disappearing from my life. The most impactful times were the hardest: physical and emotional abuse, sex trauma, feeling unworthy & not enough, jealousy and insecurity, and confusion over who I am and my path. But the absolute best thing that happened was the day we connected to my inner child. The little one who I’d abandoned so many years ago for being “bad.” When you encouraged me to love her instead of trying to fix her, that changed the whole game for me. The amount of self love, self nurturing, and self compassion I have now during the hardest moments (like sitting down with your sister/friend/coach and laying it all out there in it’s messy sticky realness) has been such a fucking life changer. The intimacy codes are life changing and help people connect to the capital M Me that lives inside of me. The unconditional support & nonjudgmental container that Ray provides. It’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life.”
stephanie l.
“I would absolutely recommend SELM and one thing that I thought about is ‘wow I wish I would’ve done this first I wish that I could have skipped all of the other things that I’ve tried and just started with this and then built from this foundation how beautiful will that be.’ Although I do appreciate my journey to get here and I don’t want to take anything away from that. But dang I wish I could have been feeling this good a long time ago.”
kate m.
“I tend to not really “love a lot of emotions.” But learning to pay attention to where I feel something and recognizing where they exist is interesting and really helpful. I’m really learning how to process emotions physically & finding ways to build back into my life, the things that make me happy.”
For the woman who doesn’t just need more information,
She needs Integration. Embodiment. Sensual Reclamation. A return to her inherent beauty.
what to
expect
Imagine a 6 month descent,
into your body, your truth, and your life.
Held in intimate sisterhood, and guided by a mentor who has walked every inch of this path herself.
A space where you don’t “try” to evolve
You become, through lived experience, moment-to-moment choice, and nervous-system rooted practice.
Where every week offers a new way to stretch into the woman you already know you are,
Not by thinking about her or performing as her,
But by embodying her.
» Imagine feeling so deeply in your body that the overthinking, the looping, the perfectionism, the anxious gripping
begin to dissolve, not because you forced them to go, but because your system no longer needs them to feel safe.
» Imagine feeling held by the world around you like you belong to the earth again, supported, resourced, steadied. The habit of seeking approval
loses its power. People-pleasing becomes a past life. Your energy returns home to you.
» Imagine, feeling sensual, safe, and alive in your skin not because of how you look, but because you are inhabiting yourself fully. The way you breathe softens. The way you move slows and deepens. The ground beneath you feels like an invitation and your presence becomes a quiet kind of beauty
you don’t have to perform. Even your walk feels like worship,
a love note between your body and the earth.
This is not imagination.
This is what happens when a woman remembers herself.
What lives in you after this work
The women you journey with don’t just witness your transformation, they become woven into it.
Sisterhood shifts from something you long for into something you live inside.
Not performance.
Not networking.
Belonging.
A thread you carry forward, rooted in shared truth, breath, and courage.
And the tools you leave with are not theories, they’re lived pathways in your body.
By the end of SELM, you don’t “try” to be a certain kind of woman.
You are her.
Not because you forced it, but because your nervous system finally knows how to rest here.
You trust yourself deeply.
You move through emotion instead of tightening around it.
You honor your boundaries without closing your heart.
You meet life, even the hard moments, from presence, not panic.
You feel held by your relationships and by the earth herself.
Your pleasure becomes a quiet, steady undercurrent; a way of being, not a performance.
Ritual becomes natural.
Rest becomes holy.
Leadership becomes an extension of your embodiment.
And if you choose to sit in ceremony, you leave with a visceral knowing of your place in the web of things, the interconnectedness of life no longer a concept, but a homecoming in your cells.
This isn’t a peak moment that fades.
It’s a rewiring.
A new baseline of safety, softness, clarity, truth, and aliveness.
You move differently.
You listen differently.
You lead differently.
You love differently.
And most importantly;
You know how to keep tending this inner landscape long after the container ends.
Because once you remember yourself, there is no going back.
This isn’t just who you “become.”
It’s who you finally get to be.
more words from
selm students
stephanie ship
“My intuition is definitely stronger and funnily enough my social anxiety has gone way down, which was an outcome I wasn’t expecting. I trust myself more and my decisions, and I’m listening to my body more - so that had naturally led to less anxiety when I’m interacting with others. I feel like I really do HAVE MYSELF.”
allison h.
“Having yourself means not being afraid of the depth of the unknown. Ray addresses misconceptions about pleasure and sensuality head-on, and naturally that means we are facing a time of ‘ok if I;ve thought this forever or I was conditioned this way up until now, now what?’ New identity is scary, but we cannot learn and become without experiencing, witnessing, deep visioning and self care. A snippet I wrote down from Ray is “a little bit of sttention with a little bit of intention goes a long way.” I feel like I;m on the cusp of this program truly redefining what I know are my rights as a woman - untangling societal expectations and trying to undo shame.”
breeanna l.
“Your light in this earth is pure gold. I’m so grateful for you shining so bright. This came through as I fell asleep last night. About you: You are teaching us how safe it gets to be to show up on earth as an embodied goddess.”
stephanie l.
“Ray is powerful, organized, a natural leader and fiercely kind. Before this work I didn’t feel comfortable with my own truth. I always felt I needed to please other over myself. It was built in inner dialogue…that I didn’t have the right to choose me. Fast forward to now, it has been such a huge shift in the way I speak to myself and how I manage that shadow. The spirit of this group is so powerful. Having a pack of wild women who share your truth, and who you get to share their experience with…is something I will cherish for the rest of my life. I saw myself in these women and they saw me too. Such a sisterhood. Ray is a vibrant rainbow of energy!”
SELM
The Sensually Embodied Living Method
the
experience
SELM is a 6-month immersive, intimate training for women designed to root you back into your body, your truth, your feminine aliveness, and your capacity to lead yourself and others through life with clarity, softness, and depth.
You journey inside a small cohort of no more than 8-10 women.
You are held through a structured, proven curriculum and supported weekly in live sessions where we move through what’s alive in your life and body in real time.
This is not just information.
It’s integration, practice, and lived embodiment.
Each phase deepens your capacity, expands your nervous system safety, and anchors you into a different dimension of your feminine leadership, intimacy with life, and inner authority.
The Rhythm & Support You Receive
• Weekly live calls + embodiment practices
• Proven immersive curriculum
• Intimate cohort (max 10 women)
• Direct guidance, personal support, emotional attunement
• Ritual, somatic tools, nervous system rewiring
• Real-time coaching + live integration
• Optional in-person ceremony opportunity
• Long-term skillset for self-leadership + feminine embodiment
What you walk away with
A nervous system that trusts life.
A body that feels like home.
A mind that isn’t running the show.
A feminine essence that is alive, grounded, sensual, and steady.
A way of walking through the world that honors your truth.
A sisterhood rooted in reality, not performance.
A woman who doesn’t “try” to be
she is.
phase 1
Foundations: Mind, Nervous System & Vision
• Understand your subconscious patterns and protective strategies
• Learn how your nervous system opens, and where it defaults to protection
• Build a grounded, embodied vision for your life (not a fantasy, a path)
• Begin rewiring patterns like perfectionism, self-abandonment, and freeze
• Establish daily spiritual + somatic ritual (even if you've never had one)
• Meet your inner guidance and begin trusting your internal signals
• Start shifting from cognitive processing → embodied presence
Outcome:
A regulated baseline, clear vision, self-awareness, inner steadiness, and a relationship with your nervous system that builds safety, not self-pressure.
phase 2
Reconnection: Body, Sensation & Emotional Alchemy
• Relearn your body’s language and subtle somatic cues
• Understand emotional scale + how to move through emotions without overwhelm
• Release bracing, shutdown, numbness, and over-functioning
• Learn to prevent emotional build-up → physical symptoms + burnout
• Practice sustainable nervous system expansion (not force, not collapse)
• Open gently to aliveness, joy, and presence
• Become a woman who can feel and still stay rooted
Outcome:
Your body becomes your ally.
You stop surviving life and start inhabiting it.
phase 3
Sensuality & Sexual Energy as Healing Intelligence
• Release shame, conditioning, and fear around your sexuality
• Learn to cultivate sensual + erotic energy safely and without performance
• Use sexual energy for emotional clearing + spiritual connection
• Restore your feminine aliveness, softness, and creativity
• Awaken pleasure as a nervous-system resource, not a reward
• Rebuild a relationship to your body that feels sacred, intimate, and safe
Outcome:
Confidence, aliveness, creativity, intimacy, and deep feminine trust in yourself — from the inside out.
phase 4
The Intimacy Codes™ Embodied Feminine Leadership
Become the most grounded, attuned, emotionally safe woman in the room.
• Learn the somatic mechanics of intimacy + relational safety
• Master boundaries that are clear, loving, and rooted in truth
• Understand nervous systems in real-time for deeper connection
• Lead conversations, partnership, group energy, and emotion with calm power
• Create safety in relationships, work, and community
• Hold space in your body, not in your mind
• Move from hyper-independence → relational, sovereign leadership
Outcome:
A woman who leads by embodiment, not effort.
A nervous-system anchored leader who softens rooms just by being in them.
phase 5
Ceremony
(Optional + By Alignment Only)
For those who feel called, prepared, and aligned, you may be invited into an intimate overnight plant-medicine ceremony with your cohort sisters.
• Held in deep safety, integrity, and reverence
• A threshold experience that integrates the work on a cellular level
• Community nervous system regulating in shared presence
• A return to ancestral ways of healing and remembering
• A lived experience of surrender, trust, and embodied truth
Outcome:
Not a peak, an anchoring.
A felt remembrance of connection, belonging, and inner guidance.
Ceremony is optional and invitational, offered only when there is true calling, readiness, and alignment.
frequently asked
questions
-
SE.M is a 6-month initiation.
-
This is Ray’s life’s body of work. She is leading the main sessions, facilitating the ceremony and in the group messaging app 4 days a week for continued support.
She also has team members to help with ceremony, additional support and accountability.
-
You have a fully flushed out curriculum, daily messaging support, weekly calls and an in-person weekend ceremony.
-
We ask that you don’t miss more than 2 of the live calls during your training.
We ask that you fully participate in the curriculum and use the messaging app for support but also connection.
We ask that you do not treat this like a self guided program. This is communal healing and sacred sisterhood.
We ask that all participants come with an open heart and an open mind.
We ask for clear communication (no ghosting, no sharing personal information outside of the cohort, and going straight to the source whenever there is an issue or contraction. Ie don’t go to someone else, if you have an issue with someone else. Go straight to them or one of the assistant leaders or Ray)
-
If you are willing to follow the above requirements, YES!
So often we think we have to be “healed enough” to start our healing.
Right, like we have to “make enough money” to start investing… when investing IS what makes us money.
The same is true here. Don’t worry about not being as far along as someone or not having as much experience. Those are all illusions that part of your protective mind is using to try to keep you safe and comfortable. (You’ll learn all about this in phase 1)
If you feel a nudge…. And if it scares you a little bit… that’s a reaaalll good sign mama.
-
If you think you know it all already, or have a desire to argue / be right, this might not be for you.
If you intend to treat this as a self-guided program only catching the replays, this might not be for you.
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We have cohorts enrolling 3 times a year on average. Since we keep these groups small and intimate they do fill up quickly.
Your best option is to fill out the application and then when a new cohort is opening, you’ll get the first chance to reserve your spot!
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For sure! Once you fill out your application, you’ll see all the info about pricing, payment plans, schedule, ceremony costs and info and more!
“You were never meant to just hold it all together. You were meant to feel held, too”
